NCAA, You're Sooo Stupid

There are several reasons I don’t really follow college football (except Cal – GO BEARS):

1)My puny little woman-sized brain can’t handle following that many teams at once.
2)The BCS. Nuff said.
3)This crap going down with Tressel and too many other occurrences like it.

So I’m not all that well-versed in the details here, but I'm all worked up right now and have to state the obvious about number 3. No, I'm not going to boo-hoo over Tressel leaving, because I am of the firm belief that men in sweater vests are not to be trusted. The underlying problem is what's important here, and I can't understand why this has gone on for so long.

Why is this even an argument? You have full-grown men working their asses off daily to earn your school and their coaches millions of dollars, and they can’t get a free fucking tattoo? Someone can’t stab them repeatedly for free? What if their mentor is Ray Lewis? What if their wife is Michi Marshall?

Even if cash was involved, WHO CARES? Personally, it has never bothered me that Marshawn Lynch was probably getting all kinds of freebies and not attending class while I worked my ass off for my econ degree at the same school. (Though it does bother me that he somehow ended up with the same GPA despite not being able to spell…WTF?)

Trying to prevent college players from getting any kind of advantage is beyond unrealistic – it’s retarded. What’s next, player suspensions for getting more ass and throwing better parties than the biology nerds? Because that's just totally unfair.

Athletic talent comes with certain advantages and disadvantages. I am willing to accept that I have a miniscule amount and will never be paid to endorse an Abtronic. In return, I get to have no (well, maybe fewer) concussions and keep my brain cells - yay! Why would I have a problem with my peers taking advantage of their abilities? It's no different than star finance students that used to get wined and dined by Wall St. firms (when they could afford that sort of thing). There is absolutely no other reason for the existence of these rules than to maximize profit for the NCAA and the schools. Everyone else - especially the students - loses.

NCAA, you want to make this shit fair? Pay these dudes who are making you money and stop giving them degrees if they didn’t go to class. Easy as a groupie. If you can’t comprehend that, then I have only one thing to say to you:

Love,

The Sports Biotch

P.S. Very sad I live in Panama and missed the NCAA South Park episode. :(